Breaking Backtime Season 1: Pillow Talk

It's the summer television hiatus. The Americans, Game Of Thrones, and Mad Men are done for the season. There is nothing to watch now except for the often frustrating New York Yankees. But there's a light at the end of the tunnel. Breaking Bad returns in 37 days and AMC is re-running every episode in order.

So it gives die-hard viewers a chance to re-live the situation from the beginning, and watch in amazement as the story and characters develop so drastically.

In the show's fifth-ever episode "Gray Matter," we realize why we love the show so much - it's the writing. There is a scene that is dramatic as (almost) any in the series, where an intervention is staged with five people in the White family living room.

There's no meth, no death, and the roles of Saul, Mike, and Gus haven't been introduced. It's one episode before Tuco and the unveiling of "Heisenberg." Walt even has hair. The scene is 11 minutes of talk only, and it starts with Skyler White clenching "the talking pillow."

The intervention is for Walt to undergo a debilitating and expensive chemotherapy treatment for his terminal lung cancer, which he is trying desperately to evade. Everyone takes their turn with the pillow and the words are raw and real. Skyler is indignant that Walt fight for his life for the sake of his family, and she gets into a shouting match with her sister, who insists that Walter has the right to make his own choice.

Walt sits quietly while those around him bicker, which is a metaphor for the whole process. Until he is forced to seize the pillow and speak for himself.

"These doctors, taking about surviving - one year, two years - like it's the only thing that matters. Well what good is it to just survive if I am too sick to work? To enjoy a meal? To make love? For what time I have left I want to live in my own house. I want to sleep in my own bed. I'm not going to choke down 30, 40 pills and lose my hair and lie around too tired to get up, so nauseated I can't even move my head..."

Walt made his stand and made his choice. I choose not to do it. At this point in Walt's mind he had left the meth business behind, having just pocketed a mere few thousand bucks with only a couple of bodies in his wake.

But the next morning he wakes up, hugs his wife and reconsiders. And if you know anything about Walt's character, even just 5 episodes in, he isn't going to take any handouts. He is going to make sure that he is responsible for his treatment and that his family is taken care of.

In the closing scene he appears back in Jesse Pinkman's driveway, "Wanna cook?" That's the moment that Walter White really breaks bad...for good.

"Gray Matter" originally aired February 24, 2008.

Broken Man

We know why the show is called Breaking Bad. It goes back to the very first episode when cancer-afflicted, unfulfilled middle-aged high school science teacher Walter White decides to get into the meth business.

His former student, Jesse Pinkman, becomes a partner in the scheme but fails to understand, "Some straight guy like you, giant stick up his ass, age what - 60? He's just gonna break bad?"

Walt first retorts that he's only 50. He then says, "I am awake."

So we don't know the old Walt (except for a handful of flashbacks), but the current Walt is not only beyond repair, he is beyond belief.

Is it that the character is broken, or have the show's creators made him that way? It's an important distinction. If Walt's behavior is unbelievable to the show's fanatic audience, then maybe the show has jumped the shark.

****CAUTION-SPOILED****

In Season 5 Episode 6, "Buyout," it all comes the closest to full circle that the show has ever been. It's done through talk - which I don't like, but it's done with Jesse in Walt's living room of all places where his wife could walk in at any moment - which she eventually does.

The scene where Walt pulls a James Bond/MacGyver to escape handcuffed detainment is more believable than the scene where he reaches into his darkened soul to tell Jesse his reasoning behind the refusal of a $5 Million buyout.

It doesn't explain why Walt has decided to live at home while Skyler won't allow the kids to live in the same house, rather than living in the place he had originally moved out to and already owns. Except that we are expected to believe that he is stubbornly going to turn her.

And the same logic applies to Walt's dogged determination to press Jesse and Mike to continue their operation, rather than simply sell out for millions each.

As much as we love the series, we are begging Walt to be sensible. But he's just as obstinate with us.

Jesse references their conversation from the Season 2 premiere "Seven Thirty Seven," when Walt had figured out the math that $737K was all the money he needed, before the cancer killed him, to set up his family.

Jesse asks Walt if they're in the meth business or the money business. Walt seethes that he's in the "empire business." Jesse asks if that's really something to be proud of.

Walt rants about the one time he sold out in his past, trading in his stake in "Gray Matter" for a few months rent, while his partners Elliott and Gretchen Schwartz built a multi-billion dollar business.

So in just a year's time (theoretically), Walt's motivation changed from his family's security to being king. It's an unrealistic transformation. Unless Walt had already broken bad, and the misery inside him was just looking for an excuse to express itself.

That's if the writers can make us believe that the sympathetic anti-hero we've been rooting for is actually, truly evil.