Postcards From The Edge (Of The World)

It should be noted that while South Dakota boasts Mount Rushmore, none of the presidents pictured are actually from there. And it would be hard to imagine they ever visited since statehood was achieved in 1889, part of America's manifest destiny.

This is my fourth straight year making the expedition to SD, always in early March, and it's always been cold and most often bleak though there were some periods of sunshine on this trip.

This time I thought I'd be smart and instead of taking 3 flights from Savannah to Sioux Falls, I took only a mere connection to Omaha to spend Sunday night at some familiar haunts down in the Old Market.

But I naturally flew into Omaha during the worst snowstorm of the season. It was one of the bumpier and more disconcerting flights in recent memory, but we made it.

Most of my old watering holes had already closed up shop when I plowed the GMC Terrain rental downtown at 11 PM. I found myself parallel parking through 6 inches of snow outside Old Chicago. Just like old times!

I walked in and there were about 50 people inside, it was fully staffed, and the kitchen was still open for another 90 minutes. The prevailing attitude was "Storm? Is this all of it?" I got my sandwich to go and was able to check in to my hotel ahead of the re-air of a great Walking Dead episode. Rick's sitdown with The Governor was classic television.

I woke up and predictably the Omaha street clearers had been out in force pre-dawn, and the mounds of snow had been pushed aside.

I went to the place where I got my coffee most every day between 2002 and 2004, the 13th Street Coffee And Tea Company. The same young woman was still working there. She remembered me but not my order.

In fact not much has changed in the upper midwest in the last 10 years. There's better coffee now, especially on the lonely highway truck stops between Omaha and Sioux Falls on desolate I-29.

The drive wasn't too bad, but it was pretty slushy. I almost went to get the rental car washed. But I arrived undramatically at my destination, and got something out of the trunk.

Paper Backtime: All In The Family

Savannah native Bruce Feiler put this book out a couple of weeks ago, and as it was a topic that meant quite a bit to me, so I of course devoured it.

It's not a typical self-help book (though it does contain a lot of lists) and there is a spoiler in the title. Note that it is not called "The Secrets TO Happy Families." There's a lot of trial-and-error stuff, a lot of adapting and unconventional family strategies. As the author indicates, nobody can use all of this information, but everyone can use some of it.

The most important key to a successful family dynamic is to be agile (chapter 1). It's hard to describe other than the word itself, there are a lot of lists involved but the lists are constantly changing. Think of a whiteboard on the fridge with dry-erase markers checklisting the family responsibilities before leaving the house in the morning, and who completed them.

That way everybody shares in the responsibilities, and scores can be kept. Ultimately the children (and parents) can be rewarded or punished in a manner that they helped formulate, creating camaraderie, accountability, and personal investment.

Knowing how to "fight smarter" is also a key. Siblings between 3 and 7 fight three-and-a-half times an hour, with only one in eight disputes reconciled. "The other seven wrap up when one child simply withdraws after being bullied or intimidated by the other."

While the disputes are inevitable, the lack of closure isn't. There are meaningful projects and chores kids can work on together, and empathic exercises in the conflict resolution process.

And when you do have to punish your children, dole out the consequences with the child sitting in a padded chair. This literally and figuratively cushions the blow.

There are hundreds of little things like that in here. Everything from displacing the family dinner talk (who really has the time?) to guidelines on kids' allowances to how to talk about sex. And these aren't things that Feiler came up with on his own, or channeled from child-rearing experts. Many come from the top business minds and conflict negotiators, which he applied very neatly (in most cases) to the family unit.

The final chapter, which I found the most interesting, was how the military teaches us how to put on the best family reunions. Where else do you get the "no pain, no gain" team fulfillment, to work together and in competition on goals that appear unreachable?

I have no military experience or family reunion experience, and yet I found this chapter fascinating. It resonated and inspired me. I thought about inviting family from all over the country to come down in the hot Savannah summer for an all-day tug-of-war sweatfest. Now that's bonding!

And the word "family" is the key to the book. Kids who know their family history, where their grandparents came from, the illnesses and adversity relatives have overcome, where their parents grew up, make children feel they're a part of something bigger. That effect on their self-esteem is immeasurable.

Bruce Feiler spoke at the JEA this morning. While his delivery was nice and engaging, I felt a sense of deja vu, since I'd heard it all before - in his book! So I bolted about halfway through to go work out.

I was only home a few hours, I still had to make lunch for the kids, take them out to burn some energy, and I had a flight to catch later in the day. The second half of the Feiler lecture on the idyllic family life got cut to accommodate my actual family life. Hey, you've gotta be agile.

Changing Stripes In Baton Rouge

The #1 attraction in Louisiana's state capital (other than the food) is Mike The Tiger. A beautiful creature, he prowls in his own private zoo between LSU's football stadium and basketball arena.

But on this Saturday morning, Mike was feeling a little comatose, napping just a few feet away from his many admirers.

The LSU Tigers, like their beloved mascot, didn't get their wakeup call. On Senior Day, the Tigers were out-hustled by a desperate Ole Miss Rebel squad led by likely SEC Player of the Year Marshall Henderson.

Henderson's histrionics on the court make him a player that opponents love to hate, but fundamentally he is very sound. Besides being a great shooter, he plays good D, looks for his teammates and sinks seemingly every free throw.

Ole Miss went to 12-6 in the SEC and now has a legit shot to finally bust the bubble and go to their first NCAA Tournament since 2002, primarily because Henderson is a difference-maker.

Henderson may get too exuberant or combative after big positive plays, but he makes all the little plays. He is well-coached and well-schooled, even if he isn't always well-behaved.

It's kind of like a golfer who wraps his 3-iron around a tree, but always makes a 3-foot putt. There's chaos and calm, fire and ice.

I thought about my hectic travel day to get to Baton Rouge, but got to my destination on a still 70-degree, and exhaled. My blood pressure lowered, my nerves eased, and I sat down and had a beer and watched the sunset.

There's dialing it up and dialing it down. Primetime and Backtime. Mike The Tiger, Marshall Henderson, and Me.

Keeping Up With The Jenningses

When do Cold War spies ever get a day off? When they're not planting recording devices, seducing government middle-men (and women), or assassinating turncoats, they have to be tortured by their own? That's a pretty tough existence for a suburban couple.

That's our week-in, week-out investment in Phillip and Elizabeth Jennings on The Americans. They are so integral in how the Soviet-US relations play out that it wouldn't surprise me if the show ultimately didn't put them at the center of the fall of the Berlin Wall.

But that's still 8 years ahead of 1981, when our favorite spies went to great length to lift encryption codes from the trunk of a CIA sedan. When the FBI's counter-intelligence smells a rat, the KGB goes mole-hunting, starting with their most valuable agents who just seem too Americanized.

As viewers we were onto it, because the Jennings' neighbor FBI Agent Beeman was in deep machinations with the real mole. But Phillip Jennings should have been on to it as well when his enhanced interrogation involved repeated phone book slams to the gut and nothing to disfigure his face.

If they messed up his face, there would be too many questions in case they were wrong (which of course they were), and jeopardize his cover.

Now they gave Elizabeth a black eye, but only out of self-preservation. She has proven to be the most kick-ass spy woman on TV since La Femme Nikita or Alias. She got quick and fierce retribution on the point person for their torture, and wanted to send a picture to Moscow as a message.

Meanwhile a residual effect of the Jennings' abduction was the kids being left at the mall. Paige and Henry had to hitchhike and wound up having to fight off a "creep."

The younger Jenningses obviously have no idea what their parents do, but seem to have the family resourcefulness in their DNA. There's also a co-dependency with them, a spirit of partnership, and a constantly shifting role of who's-in-charge, also transferred from their parents.

It's an all-American family dynamic.

Back For A Limited Time Only

We haven't completed the first full week of March yet, and I'm already posting back-to-back days on the Yankees. Probably a signal of things to come in Spring 2013.

It looks like Mariano Rivera will call it a career at this season's conclusion. It isn't that big a surprise, #42 is now 43 years of age. He may have done it after last season, but last season was never completed after a freak injury during pregame warm-ups in Kansas City in May 2012.

Rivera wasn't going out like that. The sport's greatest specialist needed to lace 'em up for one more year, and the Yankees will need every bit of him. But also, whether this arrangement was initiated by the Rivera or the team, it solves an unprecedented riddle going forward. What do you do with the games best closer when he can no longer close?

A superstar everyday player can be eased out in a DH role, platoon, or as a pinch-hitter. A former ace starting pitcher can still soldier on from the bullpen or be a ticket draw for a lesser team. But a closer? There's nowhere to go from being the guy protecting a 1-2 run lead for 3+ outs, 45 times a season.

Exit Light, Enter Night...Off To Never-Neverland.

Mariano Rivera will have the 2013 season as a victory lap around the American League. Hopefully he'll have a season worthy of his incredible career, and look back from Never-Neverland with no regrets. And the Yankees will have a year to plan for the succession, without worrying about muddying the reputation of a descending icon. We hope.

And as been brought up many times, Rivera will be the last MLB player ever to wear #42, the year that the motion picture 42 is released. Maybe his final season will be cinematic as well.

Infield Out

What's wrong with this picture? It was 2009, when the Yankees got huge contributions from Jorge Posada, Melky Cabrera, Hideki Matsui, and AJ Burnett on the way to a World Series Championship. It wasn't that long ago was it?

And it featured arguably the greatest infield of all-time. Now three-fourths of them are out, and you have to wonder if they will ever be on the field at the same time again.

After a gruesome injury in last year's ALCS, Derek Jeter has been on lockdown rehab and appears ready to rejoin the lineup before opening day.

Alex Rodriguez had a gruesome injury to his pride with his miserable performance in last year's ALCS, but then it was compounded with offseason hip surgery that will sideline him indefinitely. Initial reports were that he'd be gone half the season, but as has been said on many different occasions, he may have played his last game in pinstripes.

Now Mark Teixeira is sidelined with a wrist injury suffered while practicing with the Team USA World Baseball Classic team. Speculation is that he'll be gone 8-10 weeks.

That leaves the steady guy who mans second base. Robinson Cano is one of the most valuable properties in baseball, and will be requiring the Yankees or someone else to pay him as such at season's end. He does it offensively and defensively, with a swing like Bonds and an arm like Trillo.

But Cano's shaking off cobwebs too after going three-for-forty in the 2012 postseason. If A-Rod hadn't drawn all the fire, Cano would have been some easy target practice.

With the Yankees lineup in shambles, is it possible they could let Cano go at or before season's end? Anything is possible.

The four-man unit had their moment in the sun with the 2009 title, but for all their hype as a prolific quartet they only won the one. Now it looks like their time is done.

SWM, 40+, Seeks Long Term Relationship

I didn't go to Match.com or even Cars.com to look for a soulmate. I made the rounds, had a few first dates, kissed some frogs, and even dated out of my league. But ultimately I found something safe and built to last, a Honda Pilot.

Like any relationship, you don't know what the future holds. You take a leap of faith. And most of all, you need to find a car that fits your personality.

Are you in a mid-life crisis, looking for something slick and sporty to impress a significantly younger significant other?

Or are you resigned to your position in life as a bald, middle-aged Dad who uses the car to shuttle the kids to and from school, their activities, and on occasional family adventures?

I realize that no matter how much rap music I listen to, how often I work out, or how many video games I play, I know who I am. Just Joe Sixpack tryin' to pick up a spare. The new family roadster completes me.