The Tangled Web They Weave When It's Their Job To Deceive

The Americans is gaining more and more momentum as the season rolls on. And it's not anything new to portray US federal agents as adversaries (The Sopranos, Breaking Bad), but the intricate, conscience-shattering role of FBI Agent Stan Beeman (Noah Emmerich) is one of the best turns in recent TV history.

Stan's insight and ignorance blend perfectly in the first 15 minutes of episode 10 "Only You," making you want to hug him and choke him at the same time. You can imagine his internal strife, which is the key to a great character and outstanding acting.

Stan, while reeling from the death of his partner, seeks out the solace of his best friend Phillip Jennings, the KGB ace who killed him - which wasn't premeditated. Maybe Stan finds Phillip in these situations because of some 6th sense (like Hank and Walt in Breaking Bad), or maybe he's just got a soft spot and his head up his ass.

When Stan deals with his bosses or works a source, he is as sharp as can be. But he's emotional, tortured, and sometimes drunk, which makes him all too human. Like his handling of his informant, Nina.

He coerced her, slept with her, then lied to her face when she wanted answers about the death of her friend Vlad, the KGB stooge that Stan executed in an eye-for-an-eye, coldest-blooded Cold War moment you can get.

Meanwhile the Jennings family is going through their own family rollercoaster ride. Their marriage was always a cover, now their separation is too. But their partnership is as strong as ever as they deal with the fallout of FBI Agent Chris Amador's death, and the residual effects that could bring two nations to nuclear war - always the underlying theme of the show.

And the cat-and-mouse games continue. Elizabeth Jennings can't smile on her own, a subtle characteristic of a Russian woman playing in the skin of an American. Phillip Jennings continues to be above all the physical and emotional torture to become one of the greatest spies TV has ever seen. And Agent Beeman continues to reel in the little fish while the big one always gets away.

Backtime's Bird Episode

This beautiful creature is a Cedar Waxwing. Note the red fringes on the wings and the yellow tail. That's how the bodies were identified when I found three of them dead in my yard, seemingly fallen out of the sky. One was mildly gutted like a squirrel had gotten to it, but the other two were perfectly intact.

Like many people who don't know anything about birds, a couple of thoughts got into my head. First, is there some kind of avian flu going around? And second, is this just some sort of Ornithological Darwinism taking place in the tree beside my house?

I know my neighbors have a bird feeder right on the other side of the fence, so I went to ask them if they had any insight, but they weren't home. The mystery deepened and I didn't want to move the bodies until I had some answers.

So I called Savannah Critter Control, who had been helpful when a couple of birds got into my daughter's room through the chimney a few years back. They said if they're babies they might have just lost their mama and given up. They looked very much like the fully-developed bird in the picture above so I surmised they weren't babies. I was told that no warnings had been issued about birds, but I was referred to the Health Department.

I called the Health Department and reported the dead birds, and they immediately referred me to mosquito control. Mosquito control told me it was far too early in the season for that type of transmitted virus, and they would have no need to remove and study the birds. But they also said that I should use gloves and a sealable bag when I disposed of the birds, just to be safe. Which I did, and kept them in a clear, sealed bag for my neighbor's return.

It turns out she is in a bird-studying program, and was able to call up the Cedar Waxwing through some app in her phone. She had heard some commotion in my tree (which extends into their yard) the night before, which supported the Ornithological Darwinism theory presented earlier. I had heard the birds too that evening as uncommonly loud, but my daughter was playing Angry Birds on her IPad at the same time, so I wasn't sure what was which.

The neighbor said she would call her mentor, and ask what may have happened. A few minutes later she relayed another theory.

The Cedar Waxwings love berries, so much so that they get drunk from them - which is probably why they were so loud - damn drunk birds! Then when they were drunk, they either flew into the side of my house and died, or simply lost the ability to fly and then died when they hit the ground after a significant fall. Don't drink and fly!

So now I know something (or at least next to nothing) about birds, in my quest to know a little bit about everything. When Jeopardy! comes to Savannah I want to be ready.

Cigarette Lighters, A Violin, Headphones And A Shine Box: The Mad Men Season Premiere

There's nothing avant garde about a psychotherapy session in a TV drama, but Roger Sterling on the couch was as entertaining as television gets. Not only that, it set up the theme for the episode and the season: mortality.

"What are the events in life? It's like you see a door. The first time you come to it you say, 'Oh, what's on the other side of the door?' 

Then you open a few doors, then you say, "I think I want to go over that bridge this time, I'm tired of doors.' Finally you go through one of these things and you come out the other side and you realize that's all there are: doors. And windows and bridges and gates, and they all open the same way. And they all close behind you.

Look, life is supposed to be a path, and you go along and things happen to you and they're supposed to change you, change your direction. But it turns out that's not true. It turns out the experiences are nothing. They're just some pennies you pick up off the floor, stick 'em in your pocket, and you're just going in a straight line to you know where.

It is the eve of 1968, one of the most turbulent years in our nation's history. How will Matthew Weiner and the Mad Men think tank handle the ongoing Vietnam War? MLK and RFK assassinations? LBJ's lame duck year? Bloody riots? Black Power? The Detroit Tigers?

They've already dealt with life and death - Don Draper's encounter with the doorman and the surgeon (and the surgeon's wife and Dante's Inferno) all set against the backdrop of his Hawaii trip and a young serviceman facing the horrors of Vietnam and marriage: "The jumping off point."

And Roger's self-analysis comes fill circle as he deals with the death of his mother (This is my funeral!) however delayed the reaction. And his experiences with his ex-wives (both of them) and his daughter are just more pennies in his pocket.

Now only if we could kill off Betty Draper Francis. She's a character that continues to be unnecessary, unlikeable and unsympathetic. That would be a mega plotline - Betty dying (most likely behind the wheel - don't think that reckless driving ticket was in the script for no reason) and the kids moving in with Don and Megan. That would be a significant doorway to inch through. And deal with death in the most personal possible way.

Thank You For Participating In Grand Theft: Paycheck

Over the years, I would sometimes get assignments that were "late" (within 2 weeks of air date) and "local" (driving distance). When living in Kalamazoo, I used to love the call to get Michigan State taking on Coppin State or FIU, while I frantically rearranged my schedule to procure a convenient day rate.

I used to call these events "529 Games," meaning unplanned money that could go straight to the kids' college funds. Now I just call it stealing. As with any heist there's a certain amount of logistics that needs to take place, especially when curveballs pop up.

A couple of weeks ago I got the call to do a nationally-televised college baseball game: Liberty vs Coastal Carolina on April 7th. Great. I would get home from Spring Break, and drive up to Myrtle Beach on Saturday for a Sunday early game, hit the cruise control and drive home.

Right before my own personal family vacation, I got an "oops, my bad" from my boss. The game was actually Saturday April 6th at Noon. I could always have turned the assignment down - it wasn't my fault after all, but then I wouldn't collect either. One game check = a couple of family vacations.

So my Friday adventure began at noon in Kissimmee, Florida where I drove the kids 6 hours home to Savannah through Spring Break traffic and bad weather and lines at rest stops to get back before night time. Then I printed out all my work for the Saturday game, grabbed some producer clothes, paid a couple of bills, and got back in the car.

I hit the GPS for the hotel in Myrtle Beach and it spit out 3 hours and 45 minutes, or an arrival time of about Midnight. Then I would have a couple of hours of work to do, which would leave me 4 hours of sleep before my 6 AM call time. But unfortunately the road that takes me most of the way there was the same quagmire I was just on: I-95.

About 3 hours into the trip, some of it at a standstill, I was still 2 hours away from my destination and fading from mental and physical exhaustion. There were no hotel rooms in Santee SC or Manning SC. So I was stuck.

The network's emergency travel department was useless, as were my multiple furious efforts to find hotels on my own. Hilton Honors saved the day, booking me a Hampton Inn in Sumter SC - about 20 minutes the wrong direction off I-95. The hotel was right across from an Applebee's (of course it was) so I did some homework there with a cold one while the Friday night crowd got ready for karaoke.

All the cars at the hotel parking lot were covered in frost - it was a solid 40 degrees colder than when my day started. I slept from 1:30 AM to 4 AM, showered, shaved, and then took the 1-hour 45-minute drive directly to Pelicans Park in Myrtle Beach.

Game day was pretty run-of-the-mill. We got on the air OK and the game took a neat 2:30 though we had some tense moments when the game was tied 1-1 late and we were nearly certain we'd go extra innings. The Chanticleers picked up a 4-spot in the bottom of the 8th and painstakingly put the game away in the 9th 5-1.

When I walked out of the truck at 2:45 PM, the plan was to go back to the hotel, rest up and head home first thing in the morning. But it was too beautiful a day and too early. So on barely 2 hours sleep, I drove straight home while it was still daylight. I listened to the entire game as the Yankees got clobbered by Detroit. I stopped only for gas and ice cream. I laughed at the northbound jam-ups on I-95 as I cruised south.

I was home on my couch watching the Final Four, 23 hours after I had left the house. Syracuse couldn't steal a win though this Syracuse graduate stole a paycheck. Then I just had to steal a few hours sleep before the kids would be returning on Sunday.

Gimme A Spring Break - Days 5 & 6

Medieval Times was the perfect wrap-up event for family vacation. It was brilliantly choreographed and built great drama to a crescendo finish for the roaring crowd. It was like Broadway theatrical meets WWE.

Not only was the show a nice surprise, but it was probably the best dinner I had all week. Like the middle ages there's no silverware, and everyone is served soup, garlic bread, roasted chicken, a spare rib, baked potato, and an apple turnover. After feasting on amusement park fare and fast food all week, I felt like a Lord of the realm feasting like a king.

But I lost the battle with the kids, trying to get them from chicken nuggets to the real thing. But you could make the argument that the battle had already been won earlier in the day.

Thursday was the only Disney portion of the trip, with a scheduled day at Blizzard Beach. It was a rainy morning and I had to break the kids' hearts and the water park was out. The protests were too loud to ignore, so I gave them one shot - if we left now. They complied and we got almost 3 solid hours on a wide-open, cooler day before the weather hit for real.

The traffic the final day was considerably worse. The first Friday in April was a mass exodus from the Tragic Kingdom - all the minivans headed back to North Carolina, Michigan, and everywhere else east of the Mississippi, and they all were at the the Chick-Fil-A drivethru and on Interstate 4 & 95 the same time as the Backtime Editorial Department. A 4+ hour drive home actually came in at a ++ 6 hours.

As with any family trip there were ups and downs, but when you bond for this long with your closest people, history only records the highlights. I didn't have time to relax and watch any of the Yankee games this week (thank goodness). And I had to order The Walking Dead and Justified season finales on Amazon.com (in an upset, Justified was actually the far superior hour). I also couldn't realistically stick to my diet or exercise properly.

And after the kids got 6 hours of movies, video games and snacks while I drove us back home in the traffic and the rain, I dropped them off with their Mom. But my day of driving was far from over. I-95 would test my fortitude once again. Much more on that tomorrow...

Gimme A Spring Break - Days 3 & 4

The kids often pull you in opposite directions, especially when there's only one adult capable of keeping up with them. But there is a healthy way to settle sibling disputes: bumper cars. That's a situation where kids are allowed to hit each other, repeatedly. Bumper boats also work.

The Magical Midway was a refreshing change from the Mickey Mouse pop culture of Orlando. It was more reminiscent of an Atlantic City Boardwalk type of amusement park. There are two outstanding wooden, multi-level Go-Kart tracks - the best I've ever ridden on.

In addition there were the bumper cars and boats, the StarFlyer, trampolines, plenty of video games, and what they tout as the world's largest Sling Shot. I don't know who the governing body is that verifies that, but I'll take their word for it. It was an extra $50 so neither the kids or I took the flier.

There was an unrelated family trip to the ER, but that's a story for another post. But it involved us getting a late start for Busch Gardens in Tampa on Day 4. There were some rides there that made the Sling Shot look fairly tame by comparison. Fortunately, despite the kids' enthusiasm, they weren't tall enough to ride them.

So we opted to get soaked instead on the Stanley Falls Flume and the Big Congo Rapids rides. The weather cooperated. It wasn't too hot to enjoy the day and it was overcast enough to scare off the huge droves of Springbreakers.

The kids have gone to sleep way too late every night, but also woke up late every day. The days have been long and exhausting, but sleep deprivation hasn't been a problem. Bathroom breaks on the other hand...

Gimme a Spring Break - Days 1 & 2

Spring Break with the kids isn't really a vacation. In fact at the end, I will most likely need a vacation from the vacation. We did Disney last year, and this year we returned to Orlando (off-campus) to see what other sadistic and expensive adventures the Tragic Kingdom has to offer.

The new Honda Pilot was called on for its first road trip, and the drive down from Savannah was low maintenance as the kids watched DVDs with their wireless headsets, while Dad listened to Michigan whack Florida in the Regional Final on XM.

So three generations of the Backtime Editorial Department found a very nice and reasonably priced 3-bedroom villa in Kissimmee as home base. After unloading all the toys, board games, clothes, and food, we headed out to Dave & Busters for a decent dinner and some video gaming.

It's like Las Vegas, only with kids from all over the world. The staff was very accommodating and the dinner booth was huge. We easily could have fit a party of 8.

Then today was the all-day Sea World trip. I was told this was a "can't miss" stop in Orlando, which is a little bit of a stretch. The kids liked Hershey Park much better because they qualified hight-wise for so many more rides. Though the Sea Lion/Pirate show, and the Whale show were both fun and amazingly choreographed.

The show at Shamu Stadium was almost as well orchestrated as this trip, which still has three full days left. And as any good producer will tell you, it almost always looks better on paper.